For some reason this fortune isn’t reassuring. There are a lot of things I don’t want to come my way. Unfortunately this fortune cookie says that EVERYTHING will now come my way. I image there exists a clipboard with a list of everything and a couple of guys loading up a truck to send it all my way;
“Flesh-eating food-borne virus, check. Paper cut from an IRS audit notification letter dipped in lemon juice, check. Sting from a fiberglass bee, check. Alright, now all we have to do is find someone to poke his forehead with a pine cone covered in dog poop while he is asleep in a dentist chair and (-checks clipboard-) that will be everything.”
There are so many other phrases that I’d rather read in a fortune cookie; “Everything will go your way now” or “Everything good will now come your way”, or “Nothing bad will now come your way”, but never “Everything will now come your way”.
